66 Reasons Why You Will Be Denied a Loan Modification

Many homeowners are being denied loan modifications and for most, it is certainly not their ability to pay an affordable interest rate or not having a job. Many of the homeowners who are getting denied can pay and have jobs.

So, my friends over at our forum, LoanSafe.org figured that these 66 reasons must be why homeowners are getting denied help from their mortgage servicers when they clearly deserve it:

1. you faxed me at 4:55p and I leave at 5p
2. you have dish network, disconnect it and pay your mortgage
3. you’re a meter reader who wears a yellow slicker and men’s work boots
4. you have to much equity
5. you don’t have any equity
6. you have three kids a dog two gerbils and a snake
7. you aunt twice removed married your dad’s cousin’s brother
8. you live in Kentucky
9. you live in Ohio
10. you live in Cali
11. you live in Iowa
12. you live in Texas but you were originally in Vegas
13. you buy to much Dr. Pepper save your money drink water pay your mortgage
14. you have six toes on your left foot and that’s freaky
15. your oldest child is named Stanley
16. you had botox injections
17. too many dust bunnies in the corners
18. piles of shoes where they should be in straight rows
19. piles of clothes where there shouldn’t be
20. lack of beautiful nails
21. needing orthotic inserts
22. requirement for an extra pair of glasses in every room
23. not giving a Shit if you don’t have makeup on when you go to the grocery store
24. feeling your stomach when you bend over (i mean literally)
    Can’t remember the last time you actually ran more than a few seconds
25. Songs popping into your head at odd moments that are often the wrong song for the moment
26. Intolerance when it comes to games
27. Intolerance when it comes to pushy egotistic mucky mucks
28. Ability to not answer the call when the name of the person is “not provided” and you know it’s not a person at all but collections and they never leave a phone message just a beep beep beep
29. Having a blackberry for 5 months and still not knowing how to answer a stupid phone call
30. Calling it quits on ever understanding how to program the DVD player
31. Love of old black and white movies
32. you used Tide to do your laundry – beat it on a rock at the river
33. you turned your furnace on – put on more clothes turn the furnace off
34. you didn’t tell me you worked at a mini mart
35. you bought new underwear the old ones were fine stitch up the holes
36. you had a root canal that wasn’t necessary suck it up the pains not that bad
37. you have a cell phone that you can’t work
38. you have a cell phone from 1998
39. you were married in Vegas on a cold night in January
40. you painted your nails pink on Saturday October 31, 1992
41. you listen to Boy George
42. you have an ipod
43. you have to much money in your savings drain it and pay your mortgage
44. you expect to retire someday
45. you bought a turkey for thanksgiving – eat spam shape it like a turkey
46. you spent to much money on school supplies
47. you packed your lunch for work – skip a few meals you could stand to lose a few pounds
48. you bought organic food -
49. you bought kellogg corn flakes – buy the off brand they taste the same
50. you drink to much coffee
51. you have internet service, a laptop and a blackberry apparently your have money
52. you didn’t send all the papers you forgot the birth certificate of your third born
53. you sent all the papers and I got a paper cut and it hurt real bad and I needed time off
54. you have a hang nail
55. your fish tank is dirty and the fish are dying
56. you have to much frost in your freezer
57. you bought milk for your cereal – use water
58. you have a peanut allergy
59. you ate a granola bar for breakfast the day you faxed me your papers
60. your two year old answered the phone when I called
61. you drive a white mini van
62. you shower to many times a week – once a week will suffice
63. you wear deodorant
64. you have your ears pierced three times on one side
65. you have a tattoo of tweetie bird on your ankle 
66. And finally: Having integrity.

Tagged as: home loan, Loan Modification, Mortgage Help, mortgage modification